38 Questions I Had After Watching Bonkers’ New Music Video for Taylor Swift’s “Opalite”

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Sound the alarm: Taylor Swift has released a new music video for her glittering love song “Opalite.” showgirl lifeand well, it’s a world away from the sophisticated showmanship of “The Fate of Ophelia.” Watch now. And read below for all the questions I had when I first saw it with my jaw on the floor.

  1. What is this ad? Am I seeing the right one?
  2. Why is this only done on Spotify and Apple Music and not YouTube? (Oh, it’s to get more streams, right?)
  3. Does it contain opalite spray? showgirl lifealbum colors, orange and oxidized green?Classic.
  4. Is this living room somehow Taylor-coded?
  5. Is Taylor wearing a scrunchie? I never thought that day would come.
  6. And is she a brunette?
  7. Is this going to be shot like a Wes Anderson movie?
  8. Is there something very cozy and 2000s about all of this?
  9. Friendship bracelet?!!!
  10. Is that a George Michael poster on her bedroom wall?
  11. And is it a nod to the “father figure” of? showgirl life?Of course it is.
  12. What will Taylor sing at karaoke? Does she also do karaoke?
  13. Is Greta Lee appearing on MTV?
  14. Will the bartender be played by Elas Tour dancer Rafael Thomas?
  15. And Natalie Reid, a dancer from the Elas tour, will play the girl sitting next to Taylor?
  16. Did Taylor order Cosmos? (Also: of course. )
  17. Is Taylor Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda, or Samantha?
  18. Is Jodie Turner-Smith a fitness instructor?
  19. Domhnall Gleeson to be Taylor’s other half?
  20. Isn’t the person in charge of the ticket office Kevin Scheitzbach, a dancer on the Elas tour?
  21. Is this the most British Christmas setup ever?
  22. And now they are together!!!???
  23. Is the photographer Lewis Capaldi?
  24. Is this Starcourt Mall? stranger things?
  25. Is this the weirdest music video Taylor has ever made?
  26. Nothing says love like matching pretzels, right?
  27. And Graham Norton too?! Oh, this is everyone Taylor was on Graham Norton’s couch with, right?
  28. And are Elas tour dancers Sam McWilliams and Whyley Yoshimura talking to Graham?
  29. Is Cillian Murphy also in an ad?
  30. Is this glittering dance number surprising?
  31. Is this literally a city hall dance contest?
  32. Who can judge this other than Eras Tour dancer Kameron Saunders?
  33. What’s with this weird end credits about where are the rocks and cacti now?
  34. Is this Domhnall Gleeson’s best free publicity? paper?
  35. What projects were Jodie and Greta pursuing again?
  36. Oh, wow, did Killian also do the voiceover for the Opalite ad? I guess that’s what he does after he wins the Oscar.
  37. How long after this episode did Taylor approach all of them to do this? Just the mastermind.
  38. Is this proof that Taylor is, and always will be, an Anglophile?



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